Happy Halloween!!!!!!!

October is here with a new batch of writers and creative (some spooky) submissions.  This month we have seventeen pieces.  Yes, you read this correctly.  Seventeen.  So, for this month I will give you ample time to complete your assignment.  Read ALL pieces.  Choose four to comment.  Choose two pieces that made you THINK! and two that you LOVE!  Be sure to give at least one reason for choosing the selection.   Feel free to comment on more, if you wish.  Writers love when they get comments.  Comments are due Sunday, October 30.

Writers,
Watch your page and respond to at least two comments.  ALSO, choose two pieces (of the seventeen), one that made you THINK! and the other that you LOVE!  Your comments are due no later than Wednesday, November 2.

Enjoy your reading this month.  It's pretty fantastic.  Or, should I say, bootastic?

Happy Haunts and Boos!!!

Mrs. Solano

Creature--Vanessa

All she could remember was, You’ll sense him...it. You’ll know it’s coming and all you can do at that point is run.

But what else had he told her? What was its weakness?

As she reached a clearing, she stopped, rapping her bloodied knuckles against her forehead and trying her hardest to remember.

Not everyone escapes, he had said. In fact, only four ever have.

Her thoughts were interrupted by that feeling again. That icy chill that’s become so familiar, the one that makes her breaths turn to clouds right in front of her. It was catching up.

She looked up and saw that there were three paths in front of her. She slumped her shoulders and let out a groan.  

How Frost-esque, she thought.

She chose the one farthest to the right and took off. Her lungs burned from the hours of running and with none of the hatches she was told held shelter in sight, she was losing her strength. And her will to keep going.

She ran and ran, her heavy breaths the only sounds in her ears. Until she felt it once again.

Just keep going.

But this time, the feeling grew stronger with each step she took.

It’s all in my head, she thought. Eventually, it’ll go away again.

But it didn’t, and each step drained her more and more.

Not now. Not after all this time and pointless running, it couldn’t take her now.

Her thoughts were interrupted once more as she stumbled on a tree root, her ankle twisting as she failed miserably trying to catch herself with the trunk. A yelp of pain escaped her mouth at the same time she looked down to see the bone sticking out of her foot, and at once she saw why, after all this time, she had suddenly been so stupid as to stumble over a tiny root.

She was shrinking, how could she possibly be shrinking?

The world loomed over her now. She lay sprawled atop a dry, crinkled leaf, its color indistinguishable in the darkness.

Where else could she go?

There was nowhere, only endless forest and brush. She heard the snap of a twig behind her. A grunt. The snapping became faster and louder, and all she could do was lay there shaking, shivering on her small, lonely leaf. Then, slowly, something began to lift the bottom of the leaf, taking her along with it. She held her breath and shut her eyes until the wind whooshing alongside her ears came to a halt, and there was silence.  

There’s nothing more I can do, she realized. This is the end.

Suddenly, an easiness washed over her. She stopped shivering, her shallow breathing deepened, and for the first time since the eternal chase started, her muscles relaxed.

She rolled her shoulders back, raised her head, and looked straight into the lifeless pits of the creature’s eyes, something he told her never to do; a last act of defiance.

Alone, or Not--Aliyah

Have you ever felt alone? And no I’m not talking about you staying home for the day and feeling lonely because you miss your friends. I’m talking about being completely and utterly alone to the point where you think you don’t even exist. Well, do you? Of course you don’t. You’re the most popular person in the school. You don’t care about loners like me. You walk around the school with your group of friends hovering around you like a cloud, and your girlfriend sticking to your side like a piece of gum stuck to the bottom of your shoe. I was so envious of you, that I came to the conclusion that I wanted to be you. So, for the first three years, I studied and copied everything you did. I think it was safe to say that I knew you better than you knew yourself. I even went to the same college you went to, and came up with a plan to finally get what I want. Tonight is the night I go through with my perfect plan. I know you went to hang with your friends tonight, and should be back any minute now.

I taught myself so many things after being alone for so many years. I’m gonna use some of my special techniques on you. I even brought my favorite gadgets to do them with!

I hear your footsteps outside your one-person dorm and can’t stop the excitement from bubbling inside of me. But I had to control myself because I wanted to surprise you. You entered your room, completely exhausted from your previous activities and started to get ready for a shower. Oh my gosh! I was just thinking that your clothes would get in the way, and you started undressing. We think so much alike! I slowly and silently exited your closet and crept up behind you. You didn’t even know I was there. I swiftly pulled a rag out of my back pocket and wrapped it around your mouth, then pulled the zip ties from my other pocket and tied your hands and legs, all in a span of 15 seconds. I taught myself to do this a long time ago and practiced religiously on various items and people until it became a second nature to me. And now I’m able to do it to you! Isn’t that great! As I picked you up off the floor and turned you to face me, I saw the fear in your eyes. “You don’t have to be afraid. I’m going to take great care of you.” I said as I picked you up and gently laid you on your bed. As I got onto the bed, you started squirming away from me. “Why are you squirming away from me? It’s not like I’m gonna rape you. That’s mental.” I told you and sat on your naked thighs to stop you. “Now if you stay still, it won’t hurt as much.” I brought out my favorite carving knife and brought it to your face. When you saw the knife, you started struggling harshly with absolute terror in your eyes.

It made me very mad.

“I thought I told you not to be afraid, and that I was going to take care of you. I was going to go slow for you, but now I changed my mind.” As I brought the carving knife back to your face and started cutting into it, you let out the most ferocious yell, but it was muted by the rag around your mouth. Blood was pouring out by the gallons, soaking your sheets. Your screams were slowly weakening and by the time I was done, you were barely holding on to your consciousness.

Now, my turn.

I’ve mentally and physically prepared myself for this, so besides the slight pain it was pretty easy. I finished carving my face, peeled both of our faces off, switched them, and sewed them in place. You were already dead when I started sewing my old face to you. Such a shame. I wanted you to live through my boring life and see what it feels like to be nothing.

Well, it’s whatever, because I’ve finally accomplished my life long dream of becoming you. I’m finally popular. I finally have friends. I’m finally not alone.

Paralyzed--Gerardo

I can’t move, my body frozen, paralyzed. It was 12:47 as I was on my phone laying down on my bed looking at my ex’s new bf on twitter. I hate that guy so much, I mean what does he have that I don’t besides being good looking, tall, and captain of the wrestling team. Anyways I decided to leave my phone and go to bed since I have to wake up early for school. So I dropped my phone on the floor and dozed off to sleep. It started off like any other dreams off mine, my ex dumping her lame boyfriend and running back into my arms. Then suddenly the dream shifted to where I was a super hero flying from country to country and saving pretty women. As the dream started to get better my body suddenly shook and I became physically frozen. I opened my eyes and tried to move my body with all the strength I had but it was no use I was still stuck in bed. I tried screaming, yelling out to my parents for help but my mouth seemed like it was sown together, nothing came out. As I froze helplessly my door handle began to move and my door started to open. I began shouting with joy, mentally speaking, thinking it was one of my parents coming to check on me too see if I was still on my phone. As the door opened fully I noticed that neither of my parents were there.  That was funny I thought, what else could have opened the door? As I finished my last thought a shadowy figure caught the corner of my eye. Now my heart began racing, thinking endlessly what the shadowy figure could be. I thought maybe it was a ghost or a demon coming after my soul? The figure began getting closer and my heart began beating even louder than it already was. I tried to move but no movement came out. Now the figure stood over me, it’s tall, dark body, long arms with sharp claws on his hands reached out to me. I felt his hand on my chest as his claws dug into my chest. I tried screaming again but nothing came out. I closed my eyes expecting the worst and then the timer of my phone went off as I had set it to wake me up at 6 am. The shadowy figure left with a blink off an eye and I regained movement in my body. I told my parents what had happened but they blamed it on my imagination. I went to school not saying a word to anybody about the incident for fear of my friends calling me crazy. As I was walking to my first period I began feeling excruciating pain on my chest. I ran to the bathroom and took of my shirt to see why my chest was in so much pain. In the mirror, clawed on my chest it read, “ See you soon.”

Roses--Mackenzie

No balloons. No stuffed cats, dogs, or bears. No comically large cards. No cakes,
cookies, or candy. No flowers. Especially not flowers. Never. Any. Flowers.

I find myself explaining this to the nurse as she empties my tray and glances
around the room.

“I just think it’s bad karma to have something so beautiful killed and displayed.
Like ‘oh how pretty and dead.’ Especially in a hospital. W ho invites dead things into a
hospital, right?”I ask. She smiles warily and nods her head.

“I never let people bring them. I mean, Adam tries of course. And my mom. But
it’s a personal choice for me. I feel like...when you get those ‘feel better’ or ‘get well
soon’ things...you introduce the possibility of another o utcome besides those things.
Like, of course I’m going to get better, no need to jinx it, you know? I mean, I’m in a
hospital, I’m obviously being cared for…” I continue, in a hurried sort of voice that must
seem frantic to the nurse, as she’s begun to back away from my bed, nodding along
with a scared smile tight on her lips.

“I’ll have your dinner brought in at six.” I hear as she practically sprints out the
door, leaving me to my admittedly lonely, bare room.

I wonder where Adam is. This is the third time we’ve been to the hospital in the
last year, so i know he can’t have gotten lost on his way to get coffee. He left over an
hour ago.

Time goes by quicker than I thought it would being alone in bed. I get a call from
my mom, give her the same speech about being fine and in good hands and these
people are professionals and it’s not even as bad as Adam is making it out to be. She
says she loves me and tells me to feel be-. But I hang up before she can finish. Jinxes
and all that.

Dinner comes and goes. As I’m texting Adam for the fiftieth time, my door swings
open. An doctor walks in first, wearing his lab coat and a look of apathy. Then comes
Adam. His hair is rumpled, eyes puffy, shirt wrinkled. And he’s carrying a vase of
pristine white roses. My heart swells for a second My favorite. Then it plummets. Adam
knows the rules.
“Roses?” I whisper, my throat dry. He can’t meet my eyes as he places them at
my bedside table.

Dr. Apathy talks for a while. Adam leaves the room when I start to cry. Ugly
crying. Snot-smearing, chest-rattling sobs.

Night falls, and my gaze hasn't left the roses for hours. Moonlight slices through
the blinds and illuminates them. They are pearly and ethereal and taunting. They won’t
last more than a few days, yet they stand unafraid and elegant.

I whisper to them, “This is your fault.”

There is a magnificent explosion of water, glass, and petals. I fall asleep despite
the stinging cut in my hand.

Mr. Perfect Must Die--Valeria

            I sit here looking back at all of our old pictures, all I could think about is how we fought seconds after the smile was captured. All I could think about was your silent yelling, your clenching fists, your twitching eyebrow, and blackened eyes. All I could think about was how you pushed me, how you pulled me, how you shook, how you bruised me because you couldn’t recognize your own strength. You yelled at me for being silent but, as soon as I spoke your eyes called me names; I preferred to sit there in silence and physically deal with it rather than emotionally. My confidence, my independence was completely destroyed because you were better than me and I didn’t realize your dominance until it wasn’t present. You didn’t let me work, you controlled what I was allowed to wear, who I was and wasn’t allowed to talk to. You told me that I didn’t need those things because I had you and I believed you. Everyone around me always reminded me about how great you were and how lucky I was to have you. Teachers praised your intelligence, friends praised your character, and others praised your appearance. I always said you were perfect; that’s what you appeared to be. Mr. Perfect accepted into UCLA, Mr. Perfect being rebellious with a tattoo, Mr. Perfect with the clear skin and intense figure. In theory, you were perfect: asking me to be yours under the fireworks at the happiest place on earth, going on lavish dinners, shopping sprees, setting up a teenager’s ideal romantic setting. I remember all of the long car rides where we just drove and talked about our future together but now seems like a waste of time. I spent two years of my life dreaming about a happy ending yet, it never came like you promised. You begged me to stay with you, cried whenever I was at my strongest but, as soon as I left like I threatened to do so many times and never accomplished, you didn’t say a single word. All of the I love yous that I believed because we were living a teenage fantasy disappeared in a matter of seconds. You didn’t care about me, you just needed me to make your reputation stronger than what it was. Meeting you was too good to be true but by the way you were talked about in such a high status manner I thought maybe it was meant to be. Even after you yelled at me in public, after you punched things in fits of anger, I still believed we were going to get married. I only saw the good things about you, the good things that everyone else also saw but you were more than that. Everyone thinks that you live up to your status, and I am here to tell them that you don’t. Erik, Erik with a K not C, was a controlling, dominant, abusive, boyfriend. There, I said it, everyone knows.

My Role Model: Dr. Ijagha Eme--Nwojo

            Dr. Ijagha Eme, my cousin, is a proud physician practicing in Seattle, Washington. Before that, he was a humble kid trying to adjust himself in the United States after moving from Nigeria, where he spent most of his childhood. He remembered trying to learn the culture of the U.S. by playing sports like basketball, listening to popular music, and being part of his high school STEP. Despite this, Ij understood that he was a “minority of a minority” living in LA, finding it hard to blend well with his community as a Nigerian. Fortunately, he was successful academically as the education he received in Nigeria gave him head start in his high school education. Through all these things, he had his mind on becoming a medical doctor. He wanted to become a doctor mainly because he wanted to be a part of the team that would find the answers to his mother’s illness that was unknown back in 1998. He said the best advice he could give high school seniors was to stay focused, know what you want to do after high school, and to ask for guidance as soon as possible.

After high school, Ij continued to a path of success from various institutions. He attended community college for two years and then transferred to UC Los Angeles to complete his bachelor’s degree in two and a half years. Next, he taught for two years at Leuzinger High School. Then, while acquiring his medical degree at Meharry Medical College in Nashville, Tennessee, Ij served in the US Army and became a captain once he completed medical school. Now, he practices as a hospitalist in Seattle, Washington. In addition, he is happily engaged with his fiancé, Maria. Through his journey so far, he has learned there will always be challenges, but through determination and management, you can overcome them. “At the end of the day, there is a number one goal: make a difference in the community.” What kept him motivated through his journey was family support, his competitiveness, and the doubters who claimed he wouldn’t make it far. Family came first for him and I always remember the big grin on his face and the joy he expressed whenever we would meet each other at family reunions. Moving forward, Ij strives to be the best doctor he can be while giving back to the community. He finds the satisfaction in seeing his patients’ faces when he aids them and the connections he makes with their families the most rewarding parts of his job.

Personally, it is inspiring to know someone who truly believed in themselves and strived for their dreams. Like Ij, I hope to one day become a medical doctor, giving back to my community and healing others. Today, Dr. Ij Eme continues to be my role model and a friend I can always rely on despite being over a thousand miles apart.

“Querer es poder” or “ Wanting is doing"--Anissa

There’s this saying that my mother would always tell my siblings and I, “Querer es poder” or “
Wanting is doing. She believed that if anything is achievable as long as you’re determined to
reach your goal. My mother would often tell us how lucky we were to be born U.S citizens and
that we should be proud of the fact that we are Mexican- American. I always considered myself
to be the perfect blend of both cultures because I would listen to both Britney Spears and
Selena Quintanilla on repeat during my childhood. Last Summer, My mother shared the news
that she was finally going to become a U.S citizen after being a Resident Alien for many years.
Her birthplace was Tijuana, Mexico and she came to the U.S during her adolescence in the 80s.
Her life growing up was completely different from mine as not many opportunities were available
to her. About a month after her announcement, she received a packet of questions and a
corresponding CD in the mail. I read the packet, which included 100 questions and answers and
realized that she was going to be taking the Civics test in about a month. The Civics test is an
oral exam in which an applicant, like my mom would be asked 10 out of the 100 questions in the
packet by a USCIS officer. For the next month, my mother was studying for the exam rather
intensely. Honestly, she looked like she was part of a training montage from the movie “Rocky”.
Car rides consisted of listening to the exam review CD and quizzing her on everything about the
U.S from “Why are there 50 stars on the American flag?” to “ Name at least 3 U.S national
holidays”. School eventually started again and in U.S history, I learned about Ellis Island, the
first place that the immigrants set foot in the U.S. During that chapter, I thought about my
mother’s life. She left Mexico in hopes to make a better life for my siblings and I. The first school
that I ever attended was a private, Catholic school near West Covina. It was led by nuns and
was filled with many rules and regulations. Despite the fact that my family isn’t that religious, my
mother insisted in entering me at this school so that I would have an education and morals that
I would be proud of. She would drive me to softball practice at the park, stay up late to help me
with my homework, and always help me with my Spanish. I can honestly say that I have a lot of
pressure put on me. None of my parents had the opportunity to go to a university and I’ll be the
first in my intermediate family to have a college degree. She would always tell me to be proud of
who I am and that I shouldn’t change anything about myself in order to be popular. My mother
became a U.S citizen in September, 2016 and passed the Civics exam with flying colors. I used
to dislike my middle name when I was younger because I thought it was unoriginal for her first
name to be my middle name. Honestly, I'm now proud to be named after my mother because
she's is able to have the determination to accomplish her goals.

Anna--Elena

            A best friend is someone who you can confide in and is always there for you when you may be down. I remember the day my best friend Anna told me she was moving to Idaho. It was freshman year during 5th period where we had PE together. While standing on the field she just blurted out that she was moving. At first, I did not believe her at all because she joked around a lot. About ten minutes later as we were walking around the track, she was telling other people she would be moving and I realized that she was not joking. I remember just bursting into tears and being unable to move because of how devastated I was. She stopped what she was doing and sat me down on the side of the track while everyone else continued to walk and we talked for a while. She consoled me and reminded me that she would always be a phone call away. A couple of months later right after we had finished our freshman year of high school in June of 2014, it finally came the time for her to leave. Anna stayed with my family and I for a couple of days before she officially moved so we really had a chance to say goodbye. Over those few days, I planned to take her to her favorite places such as the beach, to the tennis courts, and ice skating. I wanted our last few days together to be memorable and special. I remember on the last day she was with me taking her to Chuck-E-Cheese because she had never been. After we were done there I really did not want to let her go so I suggested we go to the mall to walk around and then after that out to lunch. I just continued to suggest new things to do to get as much time as I could with her. Eventually the time came to drop her off at another friend’s house where she would also stay for a couple of days. During the whole car ride she kept looking over at me and making sad faces and seeing if I was going to cry. I held in my tears until I walked her up to the doorstep where we broke down in each other's arms and held each other for what felt like forever. The car ride without her back to my house was brutal. I was hysterical and inconsolable. As the weeks went by after Anna left, life began to get easier and I realized that she was truly just a phone call away. Flash forward to summer of 2016, about two years since I had seen Anna face to face. I woke up on the morning of June 27th and walked downstairs only to find Anna in my kitchen making me breakfast. I was in complete shock and ran straight into her arms. She had been talking with my mom about a time where she could come and surprise me. She again stayed with my family and I for a couple of days while we had a blast together and were able to make new and unforgettable memories. Unfortunately, the day soon came where we had to say goodbye again. This time was a little less traumatic because I knew we would see each other again. Being in a long distance friendship has taught me to not take things for granted. I gained better time management skills for now I had to fit calls with Anna into my day. I became more independent and self-reliant without her always there right next to me. When Anna moved, I had to learn to be a better communicator and find a way to make new friends for I would no longer have the best one at school to eat lunch with, to study with, to gossip with, or to be physically by my side when I was down. Anna is not physically there with me but she will always be looking out for me from 900 miles away.

How to Shoot a Basketball--Ruben

Basketball is a straight forward game. You need to put the ball in the in the hoop. There are several ways of doing this. You can shoot a three-pointer, a mid-range jumper, a lay-up, or a free throw. If you never liked basketball or thought you weren’t good at it, developing a shot might change the way you think about basketball. I will show you how to shoot the basketball from a catch and shoot position. Step 1: Focus on the target. This may seem obvious but this step is very important because if you don’t look at the hoop before you shoot you have a higher chance of missing it. Step 2: Your feet should be no more than shoulder width apart and they should be angled off to the side of the basket. Your feet should be turned about 15 degrees towards your non-shooting foot so that your arm can be aligned straight to the basket. Also, your shooting foot should be in front of your non-shooting foot. For example, I am a right-handed shooter and my right foot is always slightly in front of my left foot. Your knees are also slightly bent at this point too. Don’t stand with your legs locked straight because it reduces your balance. Step 3: When you catch the ball your lower body should be positioned already. As you catch the ball you should dip it to about your waist level before bringing it up and shooting. This helps you develop rhythm and momentum in your shot. Step 4: Holding the ball. Your shooting hand should be more towards the middle of the ball while your off hand should be on the side of the ball. Step 5: Releasing the ball. As you bring the ball from up from the dipping motion in Step 3, it needs to come up to above your shooting eye. Once you bring the ball up you need to extend the shooting arm. Keep in mind that the offhand is only there to guide the ball and your shooting hand is the one pushing it off. As you are bringing the ball up to release it, your legs should also be ready to jump forward. Releasing the ball and jumping are performed almost at the same time. When you jump you should land in front of where you jumped and your shoulders should also lean back a little. Jumping forward and leaning back help relieve tension on your shoulders and it gives you more power in your shot. Step 6: Follow Through. Your arms should be extended and by now you should have landed on your feet. Hold your follow through until the ball has been released. These are all the steps that I think should help you develop and improve your shot. Remember that there is no perfect shooting technique; you have to find a shot that feels comfortable and effortless. Trust the process and never doubt yourself. And don’t forget to have fun!

“How To Love” --Brianna

As the kids of our time, we are the generation that influences the next, so there are things
that we start that move on into eternity. Modern day societal norms include either caring too
much and caring too little which results in 2 social groups within our society. The people that are
looked up to are the insensitive and careless but the people that are looked down upon nowadays
are people that are too sensitive and emotional. This leads to many misinterpretations of love
whether it be; too scared to love, wanting to pursue love or just not wanting anything at all. Love
is something that has kept the human race going for centuries but we have slowly lost touch of
what it means to truly love.
Simple steps to showing and falling in love:
● Being with someone for a long period of time and bonding soul to soul.
○ Having a spiritual connection with someone is the first step in finding life time
friends and your soul mate in life. This creates a bond that cannot be broken and a
bond that reaches to your inner self.
● Putting someone ahead of yourself.
○ This exemplifies how much you care for someone and that in no matter what you
do, they will always come first. Having that spiritual bond with someone will
show you what it truly means to care for someone and it will have you taking care
of them, better than you taking care of yourself.
● Being there for someone whether times are good or bad.
○ A spiritual bond will have you staying by someone’s side whether they are
striving or sinking. This shows love simply because you are willing to stick by
someone’s side even though they are at a low point; because even though they are
at a low, you still think they are the best.
● Showing affection no matter the circumstances.
○ The other person cannot read your mind therefore you must act upon your
emotions. If you are really feeling someone romantically or simply as a good
friend, then you have to let them know. From a romantic state, sometimes it’s
hard to show how you feel about someone but at times; it can all be brought out
through affection.
● Communication is key.
○ The other person cannot read your mind nor your emotions. Keeping constant
communication with the other person is vital to keeping a relationship going. You
have to keep your partner updated on how you feel about things or simply how
your day was. Small things like that create other conversations but the number
one thing is to let your partner know what’s up.
● Love yourself before loving someone else.
○ Although some people may hate who they are, you can’t love without loving
yourself. You must realize your self worth and set it as a standard as to finding a
partner. When looking for a partner, you must ask yourself if they can hold you to
the standard that you deserve because you deserve the world but you have to find
the person that is willing to give their all in making it happen.
● Making it last.
○ You must determine whether or not you want long term or short term. Love is
something that you feel over a long period of time and the word ‘love’ represents
all the times you have shared together and are willing to continue those memories.
You should always remember that a person who truly values you will never put
themselves in a position to lose you. Think long term and not short term.
● Be realistic about love.
○ Not everything will be all sweet all the time and you must be realistic about
things. Every relationship has its ups and down but it's the recovery that makes
the bond stronger than ever before. You must value all the other things first before
pursuing love because it’s not always gonna be a fairytale-like story but the
willingness to stay together is what represents love.
● Growth should be continuous.
○ In a relationship, both people should strive to be their best and also encourage the
other person to do the same. In a relationship, you help eachother grow to
eachother’s full potential. Relationships are difficult at times and if you are at a
low, sometimes it is necessary to grow apart to become closer.
I've had my fair share of broken hearts, but who hasn't. Where in the end, it left me
extremely delicate about the topic of love. I soon turned away any chance at love because I was
too scared I'd love more than the other person did to me, vulnerability, my emotions fading as the
relationship progressed or being lied to and hurt once again. Many people questioned me why I
didn't want someone to love and I would always respond “ I'm happy all alone”, which I was. I
just needed more time to myself to learn from my past relationships and not repeat it and if I
ended up finding my person through my journey then everything would turn out fine. I'm happy I
did so because I wouldn't have found my boyfriend, Adrian, who has showed me nothing but
love and guidance towards happiness. He has shown me the true definition of love and has led
me to open up to him without regretting it. Through all the experiences we've already had I still
crave new ones each day with him because through all the laughs, fights, and tears, I can't
imagine my life without him being there by my side.

Silence--Sydney

I have cried more in the past two weeks than ever before, and I am happy about that. The first time it happened the sensation was so foreign to me, it felt like a storm brewing, throughout the day. I couldn’t do anything about the feeling of just needing to cry, not that I didn’t want to, but because I don’t know how. When the tears finally fell they came streaming down my face; I had no idea how to handle the response of crying for myself, from pure sadness. The most recent incident happened when I realized that water had spilled on almost all of my papers I was so angry, and I didn’t know why.  I had no idea how to express my anger. The tears were different; they streamed down my face burning and bitter and unbridled. I was lashing out, and I was afraid, again, not being in control my emotions. After, my throat was raw from yelling, and my hands ached, and all I could remember was enraged screaming. After both of those moments, each so distinct in nature, I realized that moments of silence followed. There were no more tears; there was nothing left for me to do. So I just sat there, waiting for myself to move on, but I didn’t, I couldn’t.

Do you know what a moment of silence is?  Not the one where you pause to mourn those who have passed. But when you're mom stops yelling at you for five minutes or you're younger sibling finally leaves you alone. They come without warning, but they are eagerly accepted. You can't plan a moment of silence, most of the time. They come on their own, and they can be a bit disquieting if you've never actually realized they happen. At this moment they are much needed with the stress of trying to keep our grades up in this last year, while trying to force colleges to see your best qualities and simultaneously convincing them we're a selfless humble people, moments of silence are much needed.  And no, a moment of silence is not a break because you are not consciously making the decision to pause. Whether it comes with the first bite of your favorite food, the second your favorite song ends and you make the split second decision to replay it, or after a really good cry.  Some are brusque in nature while others are abiding. Once I experienced one, consciously, I became insatiable with the thought of more.

When it comes, the experience is unequivocal and so distinct. They have become a standard part of my daily routine, and I am grateful for them. I can sometimes plan them out; if I stare at a wall for a fair amount of time, it comes eventually. The ones I love the most are those that come when my house is full, and I am so used to the noise produced; these are brief and fleeting. I just sit or stand in awe of how quiet it can be, that it was even possible for the world to stop for this abrupt moment. And I think everyone needs to experience that, at least once, consciously, but if it doesn't, don't worry about it. They will come and go and however long it may take; your moment of silence will come. Even if you have to force it. Trust me. It'll come.

Enlightenment--Ethan

The word “enlightenment” has been seen throughout the history of the world, in various shapes and forms. During the 18^th century, thinkers and philosophers believed that this word was defined as “reason” which led them to change the course of history forever. Romanticists and transcendentalists believed that it meant finding your “true self” And the meaning of enlightenment in Buddhism probably has the most complex meanings. In some cases it means “pure and unqualified knowledge” or “state of perfect knowledge combined with infinite compassion.” But according to Buddhism, to achieve this type of enlightenment, one must detach themselves from the Earth to relieve themselves from earthly possessions thus ending their own self-suffering and gaining a new and unbiased perspective. Although detachment is essential to achieving “enlightenment” there is a contradiction within the Buddhist definition. To be detached from the earthly possessions means that one does not have feelings for such things, yet one must also be compassionate towards other people. But how? Both are required to be “enlightened” yet both are almost opposites of each other. The overall goal of enlightenment is end suffering and ignorance but in reality, that is not possible. Suffering and ignorance are just natural characteristics of the world and cannot be stopped. The true goal is to relieve the pain as quickly as possible to prevent any further damage and that can be done through sympathy.

            In reality, to alleviate suffering and ignorance one must have infinite sympathy for every living thing, not just infinite knowledge, compassion, and detachment in general. No one in the entire history of the world can attain perfect knowledge so right off the bat, the standard definition has flaws. Even if somehow, someone, obtained all the knowledge in the world, it is completely useless if it cannot be applied, and compassion, even though can be used in concert with knowledge, cannot be achieved if one must also be detached. The current definition of enlightenment, although makes sense on paper, cannot be achieved in reality. If everyone had sympathy and understanding of everyone’s perspective, however, a mutual ground can be created and conflicts could be solved. Everyone would have happiness in their life, and there would be less ignorance and suffering in the world. So how does one achieve this infinite sympathy? It does simply grow on trees and cannot be grabbed from thin air. It must be learned and attained. To achieve infinite sympathy, one must go through essentially infinite suffering themselves or just a significant amount of suffering in general. By going through pain such as a death of a loved one, suffering such as break ups with friends or significant others, one gains experience in life and knowledge of the reality of the world. As the common saying goes “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” so in this case, the damage a person receives makes them more knowledgeable and it gives them more sympathy. The wisdom and experience gained from this journey of unpleasantness is very much applicable to people in real life compared to the Buddhist definition. If a person is going through their own journey, one can use their knowledge to comfort them. Then they can use their experience and so on and so on. This will become and infinite cycle and it will spread thus making the world an infinitely better place. So, the true definition of enlightenment is not infinite knowledge and compassion. It is infinite sympathy gained through self-suffering and pain.

http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/harris/bl141.html

http://www.matthieuricard.org/en/blog/posts/what-does-buddhism-mean-by-enlightenment

Fear In Literature--Joey

Frankie woke up with a surge of adrenaline. They didn’t remember falling asleep in the
library but that was typical during weeks 9 and 10 of the quarter. It was difficult balancing their
work and school schedule while still sleeping. Their hardest class this quarter was a writing
workshop entitled Fear in Literature. Frankie didn’t want to take the class but she needed more
hours at work and the course fit the schedule.
Frankie’s fingers traced their hairline, hoping to alleviate the painful migraine. They
closed their eyes for a moment, the dull clinical lights in the library didn’t seem to help the pain.
When their eyes had adjusted, Frankie noticed the quiet. The library was empty. Their eyes
scanned the room for a clock. “3AM”. Frankie searched for their phone in their pocket to
confirm. Their spine grew soft and breathing accelerated as the seconds and minutes flew bystill
no sign of the of the phone, still stuck in the hardwood library chair. Adrenaline seeped back
into their muddied-red bloodstream, they felt the pump of substance in their extremities. Heart
still racing, Frankie looked back at the clock. “3:33 AM”. They grabbed a single Jansport and
laptop and ran to the unoccupied librarian’s desk. The air around the desk was rancid; it made
standing nearby impossible to stomach. Frankie tuned into a hum that hadn’t stopped since she
had woken up. Between Postmodern poetry and Renaissance Philosophy stood a janitor wielding
a floor buffer. His face was buried in a hooded fleece jacket and his focus remained intent on his
task. As Frankie approached, the smell returned; and with each step the Janitor seemed to grow
taller. Mere feet away, they noticed a viscous puddle that was the object of the janitor’s attention.
The buffer was doing a terrible job of cleaning the mess- instead, whipping the viscera around
and spitting it all over the books, creating a monochromatic Jackson Pollock.
No, Frankie had enough. Sprinting in the direction they came, the librarian’s help desk
whizzed by, but not before revealing its grotesque secret. Below the desk sat another puddle of
dark liquid; fuzzy mold framed the puddle in green and white. These stagnant puddles,
previously unnoticed, were everywhere. It sat in the curves of reading couches and in the middle
of hallways often next to backpacks and piles of textbooks. There was a confusing pattern of
puddles throughout the library that was slowly beginning to take effect. Frankie couldn’t run
after this.
The process was slow. All firmness in their body faded as the lights of the library grew
far dimmer. Frankie sank into themself, left only with the sensation of a crayon sitting in the sun.
Spores of mold drifted to her nose. It tickled. The last thing Frankie felt were the butterflies in
their stomach: the kind of butterflies that come in the moments before a big change or leap of
faith.

Canon Cambridge’s Life of Adventure--Adam

As Canon laid in the bed of the hospital, he last said “my goal is that when I pass, I want people to reflect upon my life and come to the realization that I tried my best to fulfill my life with greatness.” But this was heard by no one. Canon was your typical adventurer, traveling around the world. Canon on his adventures was always seeking one thing. In everything, he was seeking something we all longed for. Canon at an early age lost both of his parents due to cancer.  This was a tough situation to be in. A young orphan boy left to figure out his whole existence on his own. Many noticed his situation but did very little to help Canon out. During his mid-life, Canon Cambridge was tired of how he was portrayed since he was a young boy. So he set out achieve his goal to fulfill his life. Due to his tough background, Canon was always somehow able to capture sadness through a lens, which landed him a job with national geographic. His task was to go and capture the negative aspects in life on his own. So Canon started traveling the world, visiting every place anyone could ever dream of visiting. Imagine all the stories and the events he has encountered. Whether it was with animals, or the 3^rd world population, he was the one to experience it all. Many of his coworkers envied him because he was THE one, who got to set out on adventures and come back with magnificent photographs of the world. To the audience in his life, he was the one to admire, because Canon Cambridge had it all. But the one thing he didn’t have his whole life was a companion. Many tried to be a part of his life, but none for the right reasons. Canon was a very welcoming person, but those who he welcomed always came in none for the good of his life, but their own, and when Canon was no longer beneficial to them, he was always left behind. So in time Canon was built to be more distant. As time took part, Canon grew old, still adventuring the world and letting his spirit roam free. Until the day he couldn’t anymore. In the hospital, he laid their fighting for his final breaths. He too was diagnosed with cancer, just as his parents. Once his final breath was taken, and the traditional ceremonies took place, people reflected upon his life and did come to the realization that he, Canon Cambridge, lived his life to the fullest which did indeed completed his goal. The sad thing of his life is that he never found his companion; He accomplished his goal, but never got to fulfill his life because he never had anyone to share it with. Canon started his life alone, and his life came to an end alone.

Day 27--Andy

            Today’s treatment is done. My mom’s cry and the doctor’s voice are ringing in my ears. I still haven’t cried. The doctor says I’m in shock but I don’t think so. I don’t get how doctors can diagnose people with things like shock. They don’t know what I’m feeling. They’re not me. Anyway, my mom received an email from Make A Wish. I think they’re too late but my mom thinks I should stay positive. My wish is to see Rider and Diego. and to go to school. and to take this bracelet off my arm. But they can’t do that. All they can do is send me to Disneyworld. Well thanks again for listening to my thoughts. I’ll write in you again tomorrow. Hopefully.

The Lost Meaning of Life--Melanie

She was born on a beautiful sunny day to amazing parents and a loving welcoming family she knew that the meaning of life was to be. She grew up to be 1 year old as she crawled throughout the house and stood up and began to tumble and take her first steps, she knew that the meaning of life was to walk as much as she could and make mommy and daddy proud. She grew up to be 3 and her greatest fear was the little red toilet in the corner in the room where she spent hours and hours at. One day she walked all the way to the corner sat her little self-down and she knew then that the meaning of life was to do big girl things and stop using diapers. She grew up to be 7 years old watching her mommy’s belly grow an inch every day feeling super important that she was going to be a big sister, she knew then that the meaning of life was to be the greatest example to her baby brother. She grew up to be 11 entering middle school and coming to a closure of no more playgrounds, no more separation from boys, she knew then that the meaning of life was to grow up. She grew up to be 12 the most scariest feeling she had ever felt butterflies that entered her stomach whenever he talked to her, she knew then that the meaning of life to be the prettiest girl. She grew up to be 13 sadness came to her as she saw him with someone else she questioned herself why? Why she couldn’t be her, she knew then that the meaning of life was it’s not always fair.  She grew up to be 14 getting ready to leave her comfort and continue on to high school with the pressure of school, boys, and family she felt that her whole world was coming down, she knew then that the meaning of life was to be stronger then what she already was. She grew up to be 15 years old so many boys everywhere she learned from her friends that having a boyfriend was a must “everyone is dating” the butterflies came back she couldn’t help it no more the boy she crushed on forever was single, months passed by and she was in love dedicated to do anything for the boy she loved. She grew up to be 16 her world froze when she read “pregnant” scared of what could happen she knew that she must have her baby, 9 months passed of bonding in her stomach the love that grew for her baby, little angel born with tiny lungs, the fear she had to lose her she would do anything for her baby to live and call her mommy, 3 little breaths of goodbye, with tears running down her face she knew then that she had lost the meaning of life.

Trust and the Lack Thereof--Gabriella

All of her friends trusted her with their personal information, from family problems to drinking and parties she knew it all. Even though they trusted her, she didn’t trust them. She never opened up fully to her friends but she dropped hints constantly. She forced herself to listen to everyone’s problems but never spoke of her own because she knew deep inside that no one would care. “Why would they care?” was a question that was constantly on her mind, “I don’t really care about their problems.” She walked in to the classroom everyday putting a smile on the pain that existed inside.  There she worked as hard as she could to not only hide her pain but to make sure that the pain would not be reflected in her GPA. Those who barely knew her saw her as the nice, smart but quirky girl who had an attitude and a sarcastic tone when upset with someone. Only one person knew of some of the demons, the way she really acted and felt and even then her friend did not know the whole truth. As the monsters inside of her began to grow larger, her anxiety and depression grew along with them. She made sure; however, not a single person could figure her out. The monster’s constant yelling and tugging led her to begin to pull her hair out and even though she was sure people knew, nobody ever confronted her about it. It eventually got so bad that she decided to chop it all off. It was that day, the day she thought she chopped the demons off along with her hair, that she began to regain her confidence, but that was a mistake because the next day someone she thought she considered a friend said they didn’t like it. With all of the compliments she got, the one person saying they didn’t like it tore her down, letting the monsters regain control. She still heads off to school every day but instead of wearing a smile she looks at her shoes, when walking through the door. Not a single one of her friends has asked her why she doesn’t smile anymore. She continues to listen to her “friends” but instead of being sympathetic, her responses to their problems are cold and parental. She no longer cares about the problems of others because the monsters won’t let her; they eat at her telling her not to think about the lives of others but to think about how others don’t care, how not a single person has asked why she is now sarcastic and cold all of the time instead of the happy and quirky girl they grew to love.  She is just so tired, tired and sad, and she knows that they still won’t ask what’s wrong.