Life goes on--Mikaila

 

As someone who grew up in a sports orientated family, sports was absolutely everything. From

my father who played college football at Cal State Fullerton to my older sister who played

college tennis, the expectations to be an exceeding athlete were high. As a child I knew I carried

athletic capabilities, but I had never been able to figure out exactly what sport I fit into and what

sport I enjoyed the most. I had bounced around from swim to basketball to tennis and finally

found love in a sport known as volleyball.

I was placed in my first volleyball club in around 7th grade in the summer to build up my skills. I

would practice day and night perfecting a powerful swing and perfect stance to pass a perfect

ball. I continued to practice these skills until it was almost second nature.My first game was both

the most encouraging and discouraging of them all. The feeling of your heart beating out of your

chest waiting for the whistle to be blown and the sweat that your palms accumulate as the ball

flies over the net is unforgettable. However, the car ride home after a lost match tops it all off.

The dreadful feeling of losing on top of your parents critiquing every wrong move you made is a

special recipe for self discouragement. However with the high expectations that I knew were

held over my head I pushed myself even further to get better at the game. Building my own

court in the garage and practicing everyday after school became routine.My club would have

numerous tournaments in vegas and the experience of hanging out with your teammates was

the absolute best. Having both a sense of comfortability and enjoyment with these people was

what built such a good foundation for our team and was the main reason we excelled in almost

every match. As I started to build my skill and agility, I started to receive numerous patches and

tags the more games that were won. Coaches started to talk to me about potential scholarships

during club tournaments and parents from community teams would ask if I could give their kids

lessons. It almost seemed like my life was falling into place and I had finally found something

that made me, me.

My club team was my glue at one point. In sports,especially volleyball,it is extremely important

to have team chemistry on the court If you want to win a game. However as time moved along

so did my passion for the sport. My teammates began to talk poorly about one another and it

was clearly reflected on the court, which also reflected on the team's advancement. I loved the

sport still, but the feeling once you stepped on the court wasn’t what it used to be. I was no

longer thrilled to pepper with my partner before a game, I was no longer bothered whether or

not I got playing time during a set, and I was no longer happy to drive to practice every Tuesday

and Thursday. Almost every practice and every game I remember thinking,” I can’t wait until this

is finally over.” I continued to force myself to play because I was stuck in a tunnel vision

mindset. I could not pinpoint what exactly was making me lose the love I once had for my sport,

and I also could not let my parents down.

As time moved on I finally made the decision to quit the sport, which was one of the most

difficult decisions I had to make. It almost felt as if I was losing a part of myself by leaving

volleyball and as life went on I began to miss it. I started to regret letting go and I started to sulk

in the possibility that maybe I could have pushed through and found a way to that dedication

that I once had. I soon realized that this isn’t reality and that it is okay for things not to be meant

for you. We as humans tend to gravitate towards validation and getting into a habit of stressing

things to work out for us even though they might not be. As many people say to not water a

dead plant, why continue to do something that serves no positive purpose in your life anymore?

It is okay to move on and leave things you once loved behind, it is all a part of growing into who

you are meant to be. As with volleyball I cherished the experiences I got from it, and although it

hurt to leave,it made me into the growing person I am today. Life is full of many opportunities

and one possibility should not determine your future. Not everything in life is going to work out

and it’s just as Mac Miller said, “People change and things go wrong but just remember, life

goes on.”