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Tuesday, September 5, 2017

Self-Conscious--Cornell


School’s never been my fancy. There’s nothing wrong with it, but I mean what’s the point
of me going to all these classes? My mother told me the educated express their thoughts, but this haven of education isn’t the place to speak your mind. Everyone has this persona to fit in, I never understood it. As I sit in the back of the class, with my earbuds in, my teacher calls on me to answer her question. She asks me again, “What’s one word that sums up your grade level?” I look around and respond, “Self-conscious.” She proceeds to ask me a follow up question, however I had one of my own, “What y’all wanna be when you’re older?” To no surprise I hear a lot of doctors and lawyers and other superficial responses. I look back at my teacher and she glares at me as if I’ve barked up the wrong tree. So I ask, What happened to creativity and free-thinking and dreams, or did the education strip you of that too?” Big Brother didn’t like that question, not at all. I personally was never fond of hearing every example of a successful person have the same American Dream life story. No One was hearing me out, i said aloud, I want to be a rapper.” Everyone’s eyes shifted to me, I hear the teacher say something along the lines of telling me to be realistic. I told her to be logical, “What’s the odds of all 16 of these kids becoming lawyers, I believe you were the same one as a student saying the same thing, now look at you. I’d rather dedicate myself to something I love than to something I won’t even follow through with in the future.” I always noticed that everyone was so self-conscious about what people thought that they never spoke their mind, this is why I never took to school. You can’t be an artist or singer or vet or chef or writer in this world, those aren’t jobs that can support the life the world wants you to have. We want to be rich and have social status like everyone else in the world, and if not then we are “unrealistic”. So I asked the class what’s the reality of them having the job they just said they wanted in the future, turns out they didn’t want those jobs. I now heard a crafter and professor and pianist and poet, finally they see outside the parameter society has set for them. But repetition prevails, the AMERICAN DREAM was publicized more and all I hear once again is lawyers and doctors. No One wants to say their true ambitions, we’re so self-conscious. 


Man I promise, she's so self conscious
She
has no idea what she's doing in college
That
major that she majored in don't make no money 
But she won't drop out, her parents will look at her funny”

32 comments:

  1. I couldn't agree more on how the creative sides of us are being restricted and they expect us to envision a future of us in which we pursue an "ideal job/profession." I battle with this everyday with my family and adults when telling them I want to be an actor, because I need to be more "realistic." Most adults don't want us to pursue our passion in the arts because the arts aren't important and we can't make a good life off of it. It is so true that many of us have different passions we want to pursue but can't because that wasn't expected of us. -Ricky Gomez

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  2. I honestly couldn't agree with you more i this topic. I think it is so sad how some teenagers don't follow their dreams but follow what they think is "right" or what they have been told is right. I think you made a really good point because teachers don't usually allow kids to be creative and dream big. The concept of the story can relate to the lives of so many teenagers who are feeling a lack of creativity because they are being forced into something hugely have no desire doing. I also love how you referenced Kanye.
    -Alana Robinson

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  3. I get where you're coming from, most adults want us to strive to be something we have little to no interest in doing. It's frustrating trying to get them to see your point of view. I'm a firm believer in pursuing what YOU want to do, not what society expects you to do.
    -Krystal A

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  4. I really enjoyed how you incorporated real life experiences in order to explain your topic. Your essay had a humorous tone to it but it was still just as inspirational and held truth. The idea of self consciousness is extremely prevalent in society, especially in high school, so I liked how you were able to bring that into the light during a time where people need to decide whether the careers they want are for themselves or to fit into someone else’s ideals.

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  5. I couldn't agree more with what you said. I really enjoyed reading this because now it has me thinking about what I actually want to do in the future. People shouldn't say that they want something ambitious like lawyer or a doctor just because other people say it or just because it is the usual thing to say. Thank you for this eye opening abstract.
    -Briana Santana

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  6. I couldn't agree with you more on this topic; I believe that someone's self-consciousness generally impacts their lack of creativity because not only are we trying to uphold societal standards, we also strive to please others in what we become, such as our parents. It's genuinely sad to think that the high school environment we're in can also influence this lack of creativity because we're told that we must go to school and get good grades if we ever want to become something in life to have a promising future, even if it's to pursue something we won't be happy with. I loved how you incorporated such a realistic aspect to your piece to bring attention to a prevalent issue today.

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  7. As the daughter of parents who want me to become a doctor or a lawyer, I sympathize with you. I agree that we should follow what brings us joy and makes us feel alive, but that too frequently we keep ourselves from achieving these things because we are afraid of what others will think. I like how you also pointed out that not everyone can have the same occupation. Not only is that highly improbable, but it would also make for a bland world.
    -Lauren Whightsil

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  8. addressing a common issue with people in today's society, about whether we should choose a profession we love or a profession that will "benefit" us in the future was a great choice. I agree with you that people are too self conscious to step out of the norms and let their creativity choose their future rather than society.

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  9. I have seen this type of scenario in many classes. From a young age, everyone is told that they must be successful in order to ensure a prosperous future. It's sad to know that many individuals feel this way that they must suppress their true aspirations in order to please everyone else around them. If they are honest about their true passions and dreams they may be judged. It is inspirational you actually brought this to light. People may feel this way, but may not feel confident in talking about this.
    - Joshua Dalisay

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  10. The way that you talked about the issue between dreaming of what you want to be versus being what you're told to be was done perfectly. Much of society nowadays criticizes those individuals who want to dedicate their time into a non prestigious profession and I back that up 100 percent. I connected with this piece on so many levels and to see it in writing just made it hit home much harder. I really enjoyed this in its entirety, good stuff Cornell!
    -Oved Renteria

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  11. I really enjoyed your ideas on this concept. You bring in a point of view that is always talked about but never is expressed. Everywhere you see banners and clubs saying phrases such as "Be yourself" or "Be the best you" but very few take this in hand when displaying themselves to the world. Here in this piece of writing, you embrace this idea with welcome arms and confront the norms which society presents its self realistically instead of conforming to the thoughts and minds of others. Pieces like this are needed in society to remind them that these phrases are not just words on a poster but actually something that you can do. Why be in such a position as being a doctor when you will be unhappy with your decision greatly all for pleasing the social barriers around us. Thank you for giving us a greatly needed writing that we need more of in our daily life.,

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  12. I really liked how you wrote this because there are people who can relate to this because having a career as a lawyer or doctor, we believe that it will give us a stability through out life but I believe that we should follow what you love to do in life even though there will be struggle. I am sure that it will be worth doing what you love. I love this piece and how you brought it to life and let everyone really know.

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  13. Henri Matisse said, "Creativity takes courage." Upon reading this piece, the word courage came to mind. The elegant plea for creativity was courageous. The rejection of the standardized American Dream was courageous. The bluntness of the piece was courageous. This piece sparked some serious internal reflection. Instead of telling people that I want to be a politician, I self consciously hide behind the safe career of lawyer. I am never going to do that again. Thank you, Cornell.

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  14. I absolutely love the message of this piece. I feel that many people today only say they want these common high paying jobs because they are always told from a very young age that only these jobs can bring them success in life. I find this very shameful because those who have great talent in music, art, dancing, etc. don't get to show the world what they can do.

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  15. I really like this piece. We're often told to search for jobs that are financially stable even if they don't appeal to our interests. You used a really relate able topic, especially since we are finishing high school and are supposed to be planning our futures. You really portrayed the difference between what we're expected to do and what we actually want to do. The way you built up to the line "No One wants to say their true ambitions, we’re so self-conscious" was also amazing. You took a completely unexpected turn on the word, exposing how sad it really is the we are self-conscious about what we want to do to be happy.

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  16. I see you. I feel you. But who is to blame? Where does this tree stem from? I see how you want to deconstruct this cultural structure, but how do you do so when you don't know the layout? It's a good piece, I think you made many points and I liked your inclusion of Kanye at the end. But I feel you can learn more about what it TRULY means to be "self conscious" and why you think so many people are. We get an insight on one situation in your classroom but it doesn't better help us understand the problem and learn how to dismantle it. You feel me?

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  17. Loved this story because in reality its true, everybody just wants to fit in when in reality most people wont get the job they really want like that lawyer or doctor. Also agree with you about school haha, well good luck on that rapper career, and good work.

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  18. I first like to give you credit where credit's due for bringing up this bold topic. Many of the younger generation can relate to your piece, as it is eye opening and essential that adolescents should follow thorough with an occupation that they're passionate about, rather than taking the road most traveled and giving in to what society looks for in an individual.

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  19. OMG! Once i finished reading this it made thinking about how i wanted to become the very FIRST women NFL coach only because its so true too many teenagers and adults don't follow their dream jobs. Someone like a teacher tells us are you serious? that will never happen? Or i will make it but i won't be taken serious because its male dominant profession. So i am victim of that i know have chosen to be a physical trainer along with 20 other students in high school. But your piece says a lot about how our society is very uniform to certain scenario that is very popular everywhere.

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  20. As i read this piece I kept thinking to myself about how much I agreed with what you are saying. The meaning of this piece portrays the truth about how society has set a norm for kids and not allowed them to be who they truly are.-Raaghav Wadhawan

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  21. The way you portrayed your idea through dialogue allowed me to understand your perspective and thoughts and the perpective of one of the students in the class, it gave me inspiration and a motivated me to no just be one of those students raising their hand to be a doctor. I agree that education should stop revolving around money - Omar Abuelhassan

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  22. As someone who is too self conscious to speak her mind in fear of being judged, I thank you for speaking about an issue that others would not. It saddens me to know that I am not the only one who suppresses their passions in order to avoid the scrutiny from fellow peers, teachers and parents. I do not understand as to why society has labeled some careers more practical and successful, such as a doctor, over other careers, like a dancer and why we are pressured to chose the former. I could not agree with you more and thank you again for shedding some insight as to why we are so self-conscious.

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  23. I could feel your passion about this subject through this writing. Your use of diction gave a cynical tone to your piece which adds to your message about how students should pursue a career they have a passion for rather than contributing to the cookie cutter plan that society has set for them. Like everyone else, I agree with your opinion.
    -Arianna Perez

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  24. This writing speaks volumes! Its so true, everyone focuses on what will give them the most luxuries rather that what will give them the true luxury of happiness with their life. People shouldn't conform to what society says they need to be, people should be more confident and not be afraid of being the rapper or artist. -Tatiana Nunez Per. 3

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  25. This was truly a very power piece. It really pushes the boundaries and norms of societies because it is true, we are programmed to think that if we don't aim to be lawyers or doctors we aren't going to succeed. I'm glad you were able to put the thoughts of many people of our age into words and express the way our desires and dreams are undermined and undervalued just because we "don't know what's good for us." A great and thought-inducing piece, great job.

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  26. Growing up in an Asian household filled with doctors and nurses, I was always expected to say that I wanted to be a doctor when I grew up. When I told my family that I wanted to be a teacher, they would always tell me that being a teacher wouldn't pay my bills and give me a happy life, but I still continued to say that being a teacher is what I wanted and they grew to understand that it was something I was passionate about. I find your piece very relatable and I enjoyed how you expressed your topic in a creative way.
    -Jobelle Dauz

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  27. This piece has honestly really spoken to me because lately i have been questioning whether i should actually pursuer my true dreams for my career or if i want to just settle for what i can get and be like everyone else with a safe job and a safe house not having to worry about being financially stable or not which is inevitable for me in the dream i have for myself. I loved how you gave this piece a tone of rebellion and individuality by going against the societal norm of having a job that will support you not mattering if it makes you happy or not.

    -Sasha Hodder

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  28. As someone who has always been a big dreamer, I related very heavily to your writing and the topic you spoke on. I'm a firm believer in living for yourself and to not let societal pressures/ideologies influence the level of happiness you have, but I know that it's much easier said than done. The educational system in America is largely to blame for that but the general close-mindedness of older generations also plays a huge part. You articulated these ideas and what most students are feeling in a way that not many people do, your writing style is poetic and flows beautifully. Kudos to you for speaking on things that most people are too scared to talk about. - Aaryn Cranon

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  29. I seriously dig this piece, I feel the exact same way and have always wondered why everyone is always afraid to speak their mind on what their real passions are. This to me is an important piece that should be spoken about more and shown to all kids in school. We're more than what society says we should be.

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  30. Cornell,
    As someone that loves to read and write, wants to start their own non profit, become a spokesperson and help people around the world, hearing this brought a piece of content to my heart as I see that you as well are one of the very few people that have conquered the many fears of society: individualism and opposing the whole idea of the American Dream as that is seen as a stigma. I couldn't agree more. This was perfectly as well as concisely written. I loved the closing rap.

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  31. HEY Y'ALL it's cornell. I would reply to everyone's individually but Mrs. Solano would have to input them individually and it would be a lot more work and stress for her to have to deal with. I'm glad you guys enjoyed my story and thank you all for the feedback! It means a lot, i didn't know the type of responses I would get for this controversial story. I read all the comments, thank you again.

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  32. Reading this poem made me realize that i have been living my parents dream and havent been living my deam.We are always told to be A's students and make sure to take all these AP classes for our parents but what about our dreams.Your poem was amazing and you did a great job cornell.

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