Two little droplets live in two little houses. Every morning as the morning dew imbues itself on the grass, one little droplet does the same on his supple porch. A morning cup of coffee a fine tale that facilitates knowledge accommodates our friendly little droplet every morning. Every morning, this droplet smiles and screams in glee for a wonderful life worth living. Living.
The other little droplet comes out every night to his window sill as the owl screeches and grazes the land, with no fine book that enriches the mind and feeds the soul but a mirror. A mirror that talked, only to reprimand our other little droplet and relegate her idea of self-worth. This droplet was accompanied by feelings of distress, anxiety, and morbid disappointment. Our other little droplet did not smile. Our other little droplet could not smile. Smile.
As time passed our gleeful little droplet grew tired of his porch; the books lacked vigor and life. Our first little droplet sought company. And our other little droplet, well she felt alone, constricted by ambiguous feelings of depression that was stimulated by the walls of her home., that confined our other little droplet to fear. Yet this droplet stays strong. Strong.
Our little droplets’ homes had windows. And despite these droplets living different lives, feeling different emotions, they saw similar things. One day both little droplets peered through the “windows of the mind” and saw one another.
Our first little droplet gazed, enamored at the other little droplet for she did not see the beauty living inside of her, the life that grew in the dreary old house that contained nothing but frivolous misconceptions. At first sight, the little droplet fell in love. But the other lacked perception closing the windows, shunning the other, disheveled. Our first droplet did not lose courage. Courage. Anxiously our first little droplet crossed the great plains outside his house, facing misfortune facing danger. And fell, cascading through the tan blanket of this great field, yearning to meet a companion. To meet another. To seek love. Love
The other droplet looked out the window, curious after nights of breaking her usual routine. Saw that the other gleeful droplets house now looked empty. Blaming herself the other droplet fell, scarring the tan plains outside of her home. Home.
We are familiar with these droplets, and though they may fall for different reasons, live different lives, see different things, we call them by the same name. Tears. Like people fall for different reasons and in different ways. But we realize this and we understand. That past the tears, there is a reason to keep living.
to smile
to stay strong.
to find courage
to find love
to find a home.
Tears may fall, however there is always a reason.
I'm in awe. The last 5 lines used the same 5 words that were repeated after they were used earlier in the story. This structure is very clever and I like how they connect to form your message. Content wise, your use of allegory and synecdoche gives us, the readers, insight on a topic that we as humans understand but find difficult to analyze-- why we cry, the act of crying, and what it means for us.
ReplyDeleteI loved all the different literary elements you used to create the piece, from the last lines, to the personification, and the diction that set off such a cute and admiring tone. I also loved the very last line. Well written, good job(:
ReplyDeleteI'm loving this piece. It's very inspiring because everyone cries, but for different purposes, and I think it's really important to differentiate them. As always, your use of vocabulary and syntax is fabulous. Great job!
ReplyDeleteThis is one of the best stories I've ever read on this blog. I loved the personified personalities of the droplets and the repetition of those 5 specific words. They helped tie up the overall mood of the piece, and brought out different emotions with every word. This story was also very well written and kept me engaged. Amazing Job!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Aliyah, I tried to trigger everyone at the end hoping it would mean something and thankfully it worked. Thank you for you appreciation and it truly means alot.
DeleteWhat an obscure topic to pick yet the way you describe it translates so well to the reader. Every repetition of those key words signify a value of tears and it makes so much sense. The piece is very well written.
ReplyDeleteThis is an ingenious way of writing this piece. You pointed out specific words throughout the piece and then restated them at the end of the story which really emphasized the meaning of this piece that we all cry for a reason, but we also have a reason to keep moving forward. Awesome job!
ReplyDeleteVincent I absolutely adore your beautiful piece. I commend you for personifying our tears and highlighting the fact that tears/crying saddess, etc are universal to us all. Also why did you use the motif of the number 2?
ReplyDeleteOMG VINCENT this was amazinggggggggggggggggggggggggg..... I didn't even realize in the beginning that these droplets that you referred to had anything to do with tears and emotions that every single human being feels at certain times in their life. Like you said, there are always reasons for what we cry about, but at times we cry or personally on my behalf I cry but i can't seem to figure out why I am crying. Expressing our emotions is something important to make us feel better and continue to find courage, yet we are always consumed by our weaknesses and the only way to escape is to dig for that courage. I was so consumed by the beginning of your blog and when I approached the ending, my mind was blown because I was not expecting this to be about the strengths and weaknesses that we obtain. Thanks for this blog I LOVED IT WITH A PASSION!!!!! FYI IT IS REALLY GOOD, I REMEMBER IN CLASS YOU SAID THAT IT WAS BAD AND I PRESSED ON IT TO SEE IF YOU WERE SPEAKING THE TRUTH...AND FOR SURE YOU WERE WRONG, BECAUSE IT WAS AWESOME!!!!!! Also the way you wrote it was perfect and it made the blog more meaningful.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much safa, to be honest with you I had quite an influence on writing this piece, but it was more subsconscious than anything. I just wasn't very confident on my work since I kinda took light of the assignment. SO YEAH THANKS FOR YELLING AT ME!
DeleteI loved how your intro focused on the personification of the tears. You made them seem as though these tears had a life or story of their own and you show that through your conclusion when you state that there's always a reason for our tears. Behind every tear there's a story. I think the way you structured your piece added more of an impact as well. Great job!
ReplyDeleteWow, what a great piece. I never realized that you were talking about tears until the end, and that's because you captured me into the story from the beginning. The fact that you repeated key words at the end of each paragraph really enhanced the piece's power and meaning. This piece was structured great, captivating, and had a great message that many people need to hear. Great Job!
ReplyDeleteI thought this was very very creative. I love how you created both a story of two characters, and showed the versatility of tears through personification.
ReplyDeleteWow this story was amazing. Not only was it complex with a twist filled with imagery and personification, but the creative ending certainly presented the audience with your clear message; one I find original and insightful.
ReplyDeleteThis was really deep oh my goodness! I was trying to figure out what these droplets meant the entire time and when I read tears, I was like wow. This is such a powerful piece with such a strong and meaningful message behind it! Amazing piece!
ReplyDelete-Gabbie B.
Wow I can really appreciate the thought you put into this. You used complex language and amazing diction! Very original and nothing like anything I've ever read on here or in general. Good job, maybe think about writing more in the future it could be your calling! -Vanessa Lai
ReplyDeleteThank you Vanessa, but I'm not really sure about being writer, but thank you very much. I've tried to use writing as a form comfort and coping so its nice to know its at least okay!
DeleteThis piece is amazing! It is sweet, inspiring and extremely well written. After reading it I just had to read it again and again and every time I got something more out of it. You conveyed your meaning marvelously. I'm so grad you chose this topic. This piece was spectacular thank you for sharing!!!
ReplyDeleteYour use of metaphor is truly amazing and really drew me into your story. It made me think and enjoy the tears that are both happy and sad.
ReplyDeleteWOW!!! When I got done reading this I suddenly got the chills! Read it over and over to go over every detail. Love the time and effort you put into this, by having the tears represent much more. GREAT JOB!!
ReplyDeleteI really loved reading this. I think it is very true and very inspiring because everyone does cry, and everyone has their own reasons for crying. though it was very cute the way you told the story about the little droplets, the way you repeated the keywords in throughout the paragraphs really brought out the power and true meaning. Great job!
ReplyDeleteWonderfully structured and well written, great job. You manage to be very creative while also keeping an important message, thanks for an enjoyable read.
ReplyDeleteI was left speechless for quite some time. I must agree with many others when I say that the last 5 lines are powerful in their own right and draw your piece to a thought provoking close. Good shtuff Vincent.
ReplyDeleteI really really really enjoyed reading this. It was really thought out, and you gave such a deep meaning to each of the two droplets. It wasn't until I got to the end that I realized that they were tears you were talking about. I like how you contrasted the two different droplets, making them symbolize the different reasons that we cry. I think that your last few lines were really strong and that it provided a very thought provoking end. I would gladly read this again and again. You did an amazing job.
ReplyDeleteThis piece gave me chills reading it! personifying the tears made it clear what the purpose of the passage is, and I totally agree that tears may fall for many reasons, but they do not mean the end.
ReplyDelete-Austin Gomez
Vincent, this was amazing! I read it at least 6 times and each time I realized more about the piece that I did not notice before.
ReplyDeleteThis is beautiful. I was so intrigued by the story of the two droplets and their lives that when it all came together in the end it was amazing. This is truly an inspiring work of art, beautiful job.
ReplyDeleteThis was amazing! It's incredible that you were able to establish such a string theme and purpose using the story of two little droplets. The lesson is extremely important, the writing is flawless; well done!
ReplyDeleteYou cry tears of joy or pain and you perfectly described the feelings behind both. Making the two droplets represent the two reasons we cry was a brilliant idea and allowed you to deliver your message powerfully.
ReplyDeleteI think your personification with the tears was beautiful , I was very caught up in your piece and could not stop reading , So beautifully written and left the audience with something to think about.
ReplyDelete-Narelle Stewart
The imagery and symbolism in this piece is amazingly written, and the story really brings about love and hope in us readers. Good job!
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