Monday, February 29, 2016
"Those Are Fool's Words!"--Josh
Panting, sweating, the man sprints deeper into the endless green forest. Only glimmers of the
harsh morning sunlight pierces through the breaks in the foliage. The curly haired, bearded man continues
to sprint with a look of unconceivable dread, with his tattered peasant robes flapping through the air.
Suddenly, flames pierce through the opening in the trees behind him and a bonechilling
roar fills up the
air.
Turning around slightly to witness his almost apparent doom, he trips over a stone that pokes
from the forest floor. Agony and pain ensued as the man holds his ankle, now dripping with blood on the
ground. The blurry visage of the enormous black figure comes towards him. The crippled man rolls over
into the surrounding brush, and silences himself, except for his short, uneven breaths. He sits behind a
large tree trunk with surrounding bushes, tears rolling down, shaking in fear, holding his ankle to stop the
bleeding and placing his hand over his mouth to prevent himself from making a sound.
Coming closer, another guttural screech breaks through the surrounding silence. Tales of old,
beasts only spoken of in legend, it approaches with obsidian scales and large ebony wings, the firebringer,
a dragon. The beast shakes the earth around him and it marches forward, only stopping next to the tree
that the man resided behind, scanning the surrounding forest, with engulfing flames in its eyes. After what
seemed like an eternity, the dragon let out yet another roar, while leaping into the air, and flying far off
into the distance. The man sat there, recollecting his thoughts and trying to digest the series of events that
just occurred.
He stands up and looks across the thick forest, noticing a faint light in a distance. Limping for a
few minutes towards the glimmer, he realizes it is coming from a hollowed tree. The tree was much larger
than its neighboring timber, and it contained an opening about half the height of him with a small wooden
door that was open. He peered into the opening, seeing the inside of the tree. It looked much like a home,
but for someone only half the size of the man. Small wooden chairs surrounded a table with empty mugs
tipped over on top and a small, unmade bed resided in the corner. A lamp lay on top of a bookshelf,
illuminating the room. The man takes a step into the room, while crouching to fit into the doorway.
“Oi, what goes there?” a raspy voice utters from behind. The smell of alcohol permeates the air.
The man turns around to see a stout fellow, with a rough brown beard and axe in hand. “Excuse me sir. I
did not mean to intrude. I only experienced some unfortunate mishaps, I’m afraid.” the man says. “Aye, I
hear ya. I cun see you had aruffer’ night than I!” peering at the man’s bloody ankle. “Well, nev’r someone
to dive inta anotha man’s business, might as well intraduce ma’self. I’m Thalasan. I’ma dwarf around the
parts, I do sum’ merchant business over in the human capital of Worthshire.”
“Nice to meet you, Thalasan.” the man says, now stepping into the house with the dwarf. “My
name is Hector. I’m a trader from the neighboring kingdom of Neggleton, visiting the kingdom of
Kalecdor to trade my potatoes when I was attacked by a menacing black dragon. My stallion has fallen as
well as my supply. But did you happen to say Worthshire? That is the capital city around these parts, is it
not? That’s exactly where I was headed.”
Thalasan, now sitting down, after chugging another beer, places his axe down in awe and looking
up at Hector. “Black dragon ya say?!” “O’ this cannot be a gud thang ma’ frien. Ya need to go t’
Worthshire? I have a loada lumber to ship, come alon’, ya need to tell King Nethelon!”
After quite a bit of bantering and healing of Hector’s wound, the dwarf and human ride on horses
carrying a cart to the capital city of Worthshire to bring a load of lumber and meet with the king of
Kalecdor. Now they arrive at the city.
The glimmer of the large, elegant city towers over them as they ride. “Ah, Worthshire, ain’t she a
beaut’?” Thalasan says. “Right now it’s tha celebration of Autumn, and tha city is fill’d wit people!” The
city streets are bustling with commotion. Elves, humans, and dwarves are littered through the streets,
laughing, drinking, trading, shopping at the bazaar, riding their horses. It was a time of great happiness.
The eloquent city stretched as far as the eye could see, split into many districts and sections.
After a while of riding, they approach the royal palace. Elegant staircases wrap around a rushing
fountain containing the statue of the King, into a large cathedrallike
palace with stainedwhite
brick. “I
believe this i’ where we depart, lad.” Thalasan utters, “I got me sum’ lumber to sell! Tell the king
immediat’ly. No lollygaggin’!” “Thank you so much Thalasan. May we meet again another day.” Hector
says as he sprints up the staircase and up to the large doors.
The two elvish royal guards stand on each side of the door and as Hector approaches, they cross
their halberds to block the door. “State your business here, peasant!” the heavily armored guard says.
“Greetings! My name is Hector, and there is grave danger approaching! I must speak to the king
immediately!” The guards let out an overdrawn laugh, “Those are fool’s words! This is no time for
rambling prophets!”
At that moment, the earth rumbled. The shadow loomed overhead, and their vision was clear,
their imminent death was approaching. The baneful dragon screeches and the sheer force of its wings
breaks the surrounding structures. It lands upon the palace, crushing it completely and engulfing it with
flames. The beast shoots out flames across the city, annihilating all of the cityfolk.
So much for medieval stories, man.
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Man I always loved a good medieval knights and dragons tale haha. I liked the names of the characters and the plot to it. Kind of wanted to read more, see if the people killed the dragon. Nice story man great job.
ReplyDeleteFirst of I love your one liner as the ending really got a good laugh out of me actually. Second the whole time I was reading this I felt as if it was an excerpt from a book that has already been published and on the best seller list. From the imagery, to the diction, and the accent you gave to Thalasan everything seemed very authentic and amazingly written. Seems as though you put a lot of hard work into it and it paid off, and if not then wow man you need to share those skills lmao.
ReplyDelete-Reymie Morris
I thought this piece was very exciting to read, you used a lot of great diction as well as accents to give a true feel for the time, I felt like i was right there with them and it was exciting to keep going. I have never been one for a medieval story however this one caught my attention and I had to keep reading, great job!
ReplyDelete-Meghan Ustrell
Can I just say that this either sounds like a possible of Lord of The Rings or an event in Skyrim. The use of the different literary devices as well as the accents for the characters make the story so much interesting. -Brian Rojas
ReplyDeleteThe amount of detail you put into this short story was great. Honestly, I felt as though I was witnessing the whole story in action. Also, the dialogue among the characters is amazing and does a great job at portraying "medieval speech".
ReplyDeleteFelt like I was reading a Lord of the Rings script, half expecting Aragorn or Legolas to pop up...great piece!
ReplyDeleteI loved this. From the imagery to the very way the characters spoke gave me a very Lord of the Rings/Hobbit type of feel. Great Job.
ReplyDeleteI really like the detail and imagery used in this piece. Great job and keep up the great work. :)
ReplyDeleteThe background and thought process of the whole story was really well-planned, I feel like you created entire backstories for everyone haha. Really well written too (it reminded me of a novel because there were a bunch of terms I didn't recognize). I wish I could see where it went. Good job, man!
ReplyDeleteexcellent diction and well drawn out plot line
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed that you decide to take the setting back to medieval times! Also how Erick said i thought the names of the characters were excellent
ReplyDeleteThe detail you put in this piece was a great addition to the plot of the story. Te feeling of the story and how it was planned out was very well written.
ReplyDeleteI love the swift plot line that is very enjoyable
ReplyDeleteYour imagination did you a great service in this story. It's as if you took a page right from the fables of old. Great story, better ending.
ReplyDeleteYoooo I love the detail you put into this, Im a sucker for medieval stuff like Game of Thrones/Lord of the Rings. Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteI really like your story I like the way u made it sound
ReplyDeleteDarrell Mcdowell
Gotta love a good fantasy genre. Not many know how to pull one off, but you've done it. I wish you had more room to write.
ReplyDeleteYeah Man! I liked all the detail and I liked the plot too very good!
ReplyDeleteThis is a very creative paper. I love the way you used a different time period!
ReplyDeleteTHE IMAGERY MADE ME FEEL LIKE WAS RIGHT THERE THE WHOLE TIME GREAT JOB!
ReplyDeleteLove the medieval times setting, very refreshing! I thought your detail was fantastic and your dialogue was great, awesome job!
ReplyDeleteThis was a great story, I'm glad that you chose to base your fiction on the past rather than the present like most individuals with their dystopian fiction of the present or future. It was entertaining.
ReplyDelete-Anthony Giliberto Jr.
I loved the dialogue between the main character and the dwarf it seemed believable and very entertaining. Plus the writing had vivid imagery that made the story twice as good!
ReplyDeleteThrow back to the medieval times is always a cool blast to the past. Thank you for your submission
ReplyDeleteyour story was extremely detailed! Great job! I loved how you vividly described the events in the story. Who doesn't love a good medieval story with Knights and dragons?
ReplyDelete-karyna G
Great Job, I loved how you really made the story come to life through your detail and imagery, keep up the great work! -Damian Echavarria
ReplyDeleteLots of imagery and i could really connect to this piece. Great job
ReplyDeleteI LOVED the amount of detail, imagery, and description you put into this piece! This made the reader way more connected to the whole story! Great Job!
ReplyDeleteold cockney dialect always makes me smile and I've never been one for an old dragon story but I did enjoy this one, you got the characters and dialects down. Nice job, man
ReplyDeleteExtremely captivating piece that through imagery places the reading smack dab in the middle of the setting
ReplyDeleteI thought this was an excerpt from an actual published book! Great use of imagery and I absolutely loved the medieval fiction, one of my favorite genres!
ReplyDeleteI loved this story because it was a classic tale of a dragon attacking a city except this time everyone was dumb and didn't listen so they just all burned and died. Haha Oh well.
ReplyDeleteThis was so detailed and easy to comprehend. Good Job!
ReplyDeleteVery Interesting I can't help but relate this to The Hobbit when the dragon goes to lake town to destroy the village, Worthshire sounds like a better place. Great job good read!
ReplyDelete