Elementary School--Elisabeth

 

Elementary school was the worst six years of my life. Growing up I had to deal with being dyslexic. As Bella Thorne would say, “I couldn’t read or write as well as the other kids.” And oh my goodness is that an understatement. Since I was behind the other kids in my class I began to be really anxious and insecure about my abilities. At one point I was put into an RSP class (special resources class), or as some peers called it the “really stupid people” class. That one has stuck with me this entire time. Things like that grew my insecurity and made coming to school miserable. It discouraged me from going, trying, and talking to pretty much everyone. Not only were the students tormenting me but the teachers were just as awful. One of the most clear memories I have from elementary school was in fifth grade when I was giving a presentation on some historical guy and I was too shy to talk loud enough for people to hear. I was partly too shy because I didn’t have confidence in my project and I thought everyone would know if my information was off and laugh at me. In front of everyone, my teacher tells me to speak up or I would fail. Long story short, I didn’t speak up. I was told just to sit down and everyone was excused for the notes they had to take on my presentation. This made my exact fear happen and everyone started to laugh and make fun of me for being too quiet. This was absolutely mortifying. As if I didn’t already know I couldn’t perform as well as the other students, I was publicly humiliated for it. Even the RSP teacher herself was horrible to the students in that class. Some of the students I worked with in this class needed more help than me and had a harder time reading social cues. The teacher of this class would make it seem as if these kids were helpless and the sad part was they couldn’t even really read her subtlety. We would write monthly essays and read them to the rest of the class and when some of the students that had a harder time would mess up or not write as cohesive writing as she would have liked she would roll her eyes and whisper remarks to the class aids. Having these experiences at some point flipped a switch in my brain from being completely discouraged to even try to want more for myself. I continued to work hard and now that I'm graduating high school, I am very proud of how far I have come and what I have accomplished. Growing up I have always wanted to help children become the best versions of themselves, however, for a long time I was unaware of how I would go about this. This time in my life has helped me see that I could push students that were in my place. I am going to become an elementary teacher and provide a safe space for these students to grow. It is my number one priority to make the students feel safe and welcomed at school. Growing up with dyslexia was hard. I was subjected to bullying and disadvantages in the classroom. But I pushed through it and intended on helping others push themselves and become successful.