That Feeling--Austin

He sits alone on his bed, thinking, like always, about everything people had told him.  Had he found it yet? That feeling they always talk about.  Did it lie within those parked car conversations late at night? Or hidden in the web of lies weaved just to be able to spend a couple hours together. Even then, how was he supposed to know what this feeling even feels like if he’s never experienced it before. He was so lost in thought that he almost didn’t hear the phone ringing; he picks up, eagerly. “Hello?” “Hey! You got plans tonight?” He smiles, “Not anymore, what’s up?” “I was wondering if you wanted to hang out, it’s been a while.” His heart races with just the thought of seeing those green eyes again. “I’d love to!” “Great, I’ll pick you up in an hour.”

He quickly jumps into the shower, brushes his teeth, and gets dressed. There’s a knock on the bedroom door, “Come in!” His mother stands in the threshold “Hi Honey, where are you headed?” “Me and some friends are going to get something to eat for dinner.” Another strand in the web. “Ok no problem sweetie, just be home by one.”

After getting ready much earlier than needed, probably prompted by sheer excitement and anticipation, he waits for the text telling him to come outside, and when it comes, he rushes outside to a red truck and a hello kiss. “Where we headed?” he asks. “I was thinking Panda Express for some food and then we can just go for a drive.” Was the response. “Sounds good to me.” While driving, they go through the usual playlist of songs that they both sing at the top of their lungs to, even though neither of them can actually sing, but they never care.

After the drive, they head back to his home in time to be back before curfew, and a goodbye that seems to him like forever ensues. Eventually they part ways, and he returns to his room, with a feeling of completeness within. He replays the moment when he sees those eyes staring longingly at him every time they meet, realizing the truth behind the look. The truth being this feeling he feels at that very moment is exactly what they have all been telling him. He doesn’t care about the lies he’s told; one day he’ll be able to reconcile them, but the fact that this doesn’t bother him reinforces his realization that, for real this time,

He finally found it.