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Thursday, April 6, 2017

Find Only One Loop--Rachel

 It pains me to say, but our “evolving” world is nothing more than a stagnant society that continues to deem certain qualities as superior. We have already breached past the year of 3000, yet we still do not allow diversity to be the mainstream. Despite our advanced technology and intelligence, we as a collective population, have decided that we must run purely on the concept of beauty.
 Yes, beauty.
Now, you may think, “Oh, Narrator! Our society of 2XXX already thrives on the documentation of celebrity lives and the growing trend of plastic surgery!” Well, yes. But no. The society I'm currently imprisoned in has created an entire caste system that is purely based on how physically attractive a person is. Once a child reaches the age of 21 (the peak and maturity of the physical body), they will be “evaluated”.
It isn't any more frightening or strenuous than the SAT or ACT; instead, it is just another standardized test that students must prepare for. When it is time for “evaluation”, the child is taken to the nearest government civilian station where they must strip down and allow the “evaluators” to take pictures of said child.
Now you must be thinking, “How perverted! How can this be allowed?!” These “evaluators” do not see any sexual intention with these children at all! There is a purpose for these pictures, you know! These pictures are created into a “profile” for said child. Of course you, the reader, must be associated with some type of social media? It's the same for us! We have a social media platform that everyone keeps as a “digital resume”, if you would say. It's called Visage. Everyone must scroll through their feed and rate the child’s profile from 1-5, 1 being ‘This child is absolutely hideous!’ to 5 being ‘This child must be blessed by God Himself!’. Their profile will be open to rates for 72 hours and once time’s up, government officials will average out the ratings and place them within the caste system. Now you’re probably thinking, “This sounds a lot like Divergent or Hunger Games!! A dystopian society dressed to look utopic!” I do agree with you that this society reflects those written on paper, but you see, your society isn’t much farther from mine. You’re all so consumed with celebrity lives that you scroll endlessly on radiofrequency radiating devices. The entire world is far more concerned with how an individual dresses rather than the true issues of war and pestilence. Our Visage is your Instagram, Snap Chat, Twitter; all of your social media is catered to physically attractive people. Humanity bickers amongst themselves about the “ideal size” or “ideal skin colour” when they overlook the easiest solution: let people be. Topics of fat shaming, slut shaming, etc. would not be an issue if society was open to the idea of diversity. Now I'm being a bit preachy here. I'll tone it down. But it's true. Humanity has come a long way, but collectively, we’re stagnant.
 I don't want to end a bit cheesy, but why not! You're reading this on your own free will, no? Then you must know what you are, don't you?
Read the first letter of each word in the title then you'll know.

Have you found more than one loop?

Are you in a loop?

34 comments:

  1. Rachel I thoroughly enjoyed your piece. I was shocked by the fact that your Utopian society views a 21 year old as a child and subjects them to body shaming and casting based on opinions of others. What's more alarming is that we already, in a way do this to one another.

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  2. Impressive. I liked where this started and ended. Probably my favorite story of futuristic society and how it relates to today. -Rachel Smith

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  3. The idea of living in a caste society based purely on physical appearance is an incredibly interesting concept that I'd love to read about. It's kind of creepy and dystopian, and it seems like it would have an important message for society. Honestly, if you were to turn this idea into a full-on novel, I'd totally read it.

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  4. Our society vaguely reflects the one you constructed in this piece by prejudice being made by personal opinions and one-sided thoughts. Very well-written & amazing work!

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  5. Wow this piece really is meaningful. People should understamd that they are perfect just the way they are rather than striving to have ideal model measurements. I love how the title spells out fool. Great job!!

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  6. Really interesting piece. It is a shame with what everyone likes to prioritize nowadays especially with social media and appearances. I really like how you as the writer were able to write in such a way that you were actually speaking to us about these issues. This is an overall great and creative piece! Great Job!!
    -Gabbie B.

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  7. Rachael I'm obsessed!!! This was very accurate, we don't realize what we are living in our own distopia, even though it is so easy for us to point the finger at someone else's distopia. And it was very clever how you added the title puzzle thing. Loved it great Job!! --Megan T.

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  8. This is a really interesting and intriguing piece and it's very well written. The message behind this is really important for society as a whole. Great job! - Jade B.

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  9. I like how you used the tool of "dislocation" that we learned in Brave New World. You critiqued the superficial tendencies of our society today by creating a future society that draws from these tendencies. And the scary thing is that you make a very strong argument. Very compelling piece that leaves me thinking what if?

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  10. 30000 years ago, we were carving out statuettes with big boobs and butts, the beauty standards for women at the time, and worshiping them as fertility goddesses.

    As ancient Greeks, we spun tales of beauty and vanity, that had Paris choose the face that launched a thousand ships, over the power of Juno and the wisdom of Athena, and had Narcissus wasting away above his own reflection.

    During the Renaissance, our ladies would poison themselves and rub concoctions of cat poop and mercury on their faces to look graceful and pale.

    Then, we were all about wigs in the 18th century, corsets in the 19th, foot-binding in China, Clark Gable killing the undershirt industry when he didn't wear one in "It happened one night," Marilyn Monroe, James Dean, Bell-bottoms, Hip-hop, Skinny jeans, Supreme...

    See anything familiar?

    Truth is, we were always obsessed with physical attractiveness and will always be. The fact that many trends in physical attractiveness - height, Leg-to-body-ratio, waist-hip-ratios can be easily quantified tells a lot: it's evolutionarily hard-wired into most of us, as they indicate which individuals are desirable mates.

    So, why fret so much about it? Besides, there are many more sorts of human folly - superstition, tribalism, dogmatism - that are engrained within us, and which tend have much more serious repercussions.

    But great post, and thanks!

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  11. Wow I love how you hyperbolize the extent of how society evaluates others and how you show the true meaning of what matters to them.

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  12. I like how this describes a dystopian future, but it resembles the present closely enough for it to seem pretty plausible, at least to me. The whole time I was reading it I just kept comparing it to today. We don't necessarily have a caste system based on appearance, but people who are more attractive get more attention, get better jobs, and generally just succeed more, because people view them more favorably than less "desirable" people. It's one of the things that's super messed up in our society. But I really enjoyed this piece. Great job!!

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    1. Thank you for your comment, Allicia! I do think it's unfair that people who worked so long and hard to obtain a high degree for a job only to make a quarter of what silver-spooned celebrities make. It goes to show that being attractive is powerful enough to deviate the attention from poverty/pestilence/war etc.
      Thank you, again, for commenting!!

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  13. This is such a deep piece, it's making me think more about society today in a different view. Great job! -Lisa Ryu

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  14. Unfortunately, you're right. We live in a very superficial and materialistic world. I loved how the title spells out fool, great job :)

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  15. What a very interesting and real piece, the way that you have created this character who views us all collectively as fools and directly speaks to us is what makes this concept so unique and interesting. I would definitely read more if you ever wrote more about, very nice job!

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    1. Thank you, Michelle! I wanted the narrator to come off as this jocund character who treats the reader as children. The constant stopping mid phrase to reassure the reader was a slight emphasis that the narrator is somewhat above all of us. Thank you for commenting!

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  16. I loved reading this Rachel! I totally agree with you that a lot of people use their social media to focus on insignificant matters rather than ones that are actually important and meaningful. I thought the way you connected this new society to the one we have today and your connection between the title to your reader was pretty clever. Great job!

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  17. I found your piece very interesting. The reflection of our society and the effect social media has on it is shown in this amazing way by creating a whole new one in a future setting was awesome. I thought the bit with the title was pretty clever too, nice job.

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  18. I think this is an important call out to society to stop being so superficial and 'stagnant' as you said in the writing. I wish you would have kept on 'preaching'. You know what pains me? Is that we people don't take any steps to change we talk a lot but don't walk to walk. But overall I like what you said.
    -Ruben Becerra

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  19. Great ending! Love that you left it on a really dramatic note! The whole concept of being part of a society which is our world is terrifying I enjoy that you wrote about it, great job!

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  20. This was awesome! I really think it does reflect today's society and the way you ended it by referring to the title and the hidden message in it that was pure genius! Honestly this is one of my favorites!

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  21. I think the reason for this 'stagnant' society and incremental change is that society is scared to step up to change. To challenge ideas of beauty or what is right. We talk about it but on a superficial level, there is never a legit discussion on anything because we choose to cover our ears and eyes to reals problems and just avoid them. It pains me too sometimes to see no changes being made. I think you should've kept 'preaching' I enjoyed it.
    -Ruben Becerra

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  22. Capturing society through beauty is deep. I agree today people are so caught up in looks and social media that people tend to look pass personality. Many people want much more than just a person who can make us laugh or makes us feel comfortable. We tend to overlook because it has become a habit in our society. Great piece, made me wonder a lot about our society.

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  23. Your piece really caught my attention because it would be so crazy if this actually happened. The details you included and how well thought out this was really made me want to continue reading. Our society slightly parallels the one you described because of social media as you mentioned and that's why your piece is so captivating.it really made me think about society/societal values. Fantastic job!
    -Bryanna Torres

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  24. Whoa. Just whooooooa. Your world and the present are similar as you said, making your piece not that far fetched. As a society who's major focus is on appearance, it wouldn't be hard to shift to a society whose sole focus is appearance

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  25. Wow this was wild. I especially enjoyed how you directly addressed the reader. Great read.
    -Andy Burgos

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  26. This was a very interesting and unique piece. i was intrigued and the perspective was very different. It was casual yet approached nicely. It was cliche or cheesy and you responded to my thoughts in a mind reading way. good job.

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  27. This piece really provides food for thought because I feel as though I somewhat agree with your perspective, but at the same time I may not go as far as generalizing our whole generation. Your piece is very bold and I applaud you for expressing your valid perspective. Great Job!

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  28. This has to be one of my favorite posts on the blog. I love the comparisons between the narrator's society and modern society. You're absolutely right with all your accusations. My favorite part was the reference to the title and hoe it spelled 'fool'; that was really ingenious, in my opinion. Magnificent job!!!

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  29. I enjoyed reading your piece, naming all the flaws society won't admit it has, realistic, nothing sugar coated, just my type of read.
    -Francis Talla

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  30. This is wonderful! I love everything about this piece. The way you compare the two societies and the way your title spelled out fool all were great. Brilliant job Rachel!

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  31. This piece was rough to read; it was hard to imagine a society as extreme as the one you portrayed! But I do understand that the exaggerated effect proved your point about our society now. That's what satire is; very well done! --Joey Barron

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  32. This work leaves a lot of space for critical thinking allowing us to look on from the outside, particularly with getting in tune with the flaws of society that we can't see within.
    -Ashley Morrison

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